Regulating Morality

Is it possible to regulate someone else’s morality? I had a conversation with a fellow Christian about this very question a few years ago. Even if it were possible, why would we want to? The Bible clearly demonstrates that real life change comes through encountering Jesus, not through following a checklist of rules. Reflecting upon this today led me to write the following. It is meant to be read as a satire.

We have a problem.

Look at society around us. Don't you see how it is looking less and less Christian on the daily?

It didn't used to be this way. We used to be a nation with morals! We used to have good, Godly values!

What happened to us?

I don't like it. I don't like it at all. This does NOT feel good.

We are supposed to be a Christian nation! If we are not, if we do not follow Christianity and Christian principles, we might lose the blessing. God might take away His special blessing over America!

The blessing must be protected at all costs.

Don't you see? Hurry! This is urgent. It's all going to slip away from us.

Go! Vote! Vote for conservative politicians on the local and state level who say they're Christian too and will defend our interests (if you need a hint, these are the people on the red side). Vote for conservatives who will write and pass laws to regulate the morals and values of all Americans. Then our country will look more Christian, and we can keep the blessing!

Don't forget, it's also really important to vote for a president who's on our side, so they will appoint conservative judges that will defend us if anyone tries to complain about the laws we pass. They'll make sure to not let anyone mess with us and our way of life. We wouldn't want to be oppressed.

Oppression would be bad.

We don't want to be like those other countries where Christians are persecuted and even killed for their faith.

After all, freedom of religion is the best part of the blessing God has bestowed upon America!

Just for Christians, though. We don't want other religions to have freedom of religion - heavens no! - because ours is the only way.

The laws and policies and politicians in our pockets will make everyone live moral "Christian" lives. Then we will keep being a Christian nation!!

And, well, while this isn't our main concern, it sure does make life feel more comfortable for us.

Phew. What a relief.

Except, wait a minute, ...

It's not working.

For some reason, pushing laws and policies and changing educational curriculums and banning people and books we don't like and stacking the court and trying to force everyone to live the way we want them to - isn't working.

And now, not only is it not working, but... people are mad at us. Why aren't they grateful?!

They think... they think we are judgmental and antiquated. Don't they know life used to be better in the good ol' days before their crazy ideas?

Hold on. They think... they think that we hate them.

We don't hate them. We love them! We only hate their sin. And if we are passing laws that help them to live righteously it's only because we want them to leave their sin behind.

Or else face the consequences.

You know, like prison. 

Jesus said we had to make everyone follow His commandments, right?

What? He didn't?

Okay, but He said to make disciples, and disciples follow His commandments.

Am I a disciple? Well, of course.

What do you mean Jesus commanded His disciples to love others and take care of those in need? What does that have to do with anything?

Don't throw that liberal theology at me. It's too soft. Stuff like that doesn't work nowadays. We have to make people listen! We have to protect our Christian nation!

They'll come after us if we don't. They'll come after us and we'll lose our way of life. We'll lose our power and privilege. I mean, we'll lose our blessing.

If we don't stand up for ourselves, no one will! (Oh, yeah, thanks, Mark. You can put that ammo over there. Yeah, there. Thanks.)

What was I saying? Oh, right. We will make everyone follow our Christian morals and values.

What? Will that save them? Seriously?

I mean, I guess the Bible says we are only saved by faith, not deeds, so, no, they're still going to hell.

It's what they deserve for all that progressive nonsense they keep spewing.

Don't I care? I mean, of course, I care. But I can't make someone believe if they don't want to.

It's only important that they keep following this set of morals and values. That's what matters. 

We can't lose the blessing.

And yeah, okay, so it's easier for me. So what?

That's just a side benefit. Not the real reason.

Don't forget to vote in 2024! This will be an important one.