The Jaded Evangelical

Published on 2 March 2024 at 10:10

I have been challenged to consider the name of my blog: "The Jaded Evangelical". Was I truly jaded? Am I still?

I knew when I first created the blog, the title would be provocative. I hoped it would attract others like me who were questioning and challenging the direction of the American Evangelical Church - in particular, the White American Evangelical Church. Other who have been hurt or disappointed or rejected or tossed out. 

I set out with the goal to see if there was a different way forward.

And I think I found it.

The way forward is The Way - Jesus.

As I've invested in this new church of mine and made friends with one of the pastors, I have been encouraged. Encouraged in the sense of realizing despite what I see depicted in the news and in social media, there are many Christians and many churches out there who do follow Jesus, who reject the insertion of American ideology and politics into their faith, and who oppose the waves of Christian nationalism and white supremacy which have given the American church a (sometimes well-deserved) bad name.

There are certainly churches who host Trump rallies and spew racism and sexism and hatred from the pulpit. There are certainly Christians who march against BLM movements and shout hate at Pride parades and who stormed the capital on January 6th. There are Christian leaders who have neglected, abused, and harassed their congregants.

But these are not representatives of Jesus - they are not who He is. 

There are also churches who give generously, like the widow with her two coins who was praised by Jesus, to help those around them. There are also churches who love Jesus whole-heartedly, and long to be more like Him. There are churches who open their doors to the poor and the needy and the outcasts and the forgotten and the hurting - the ragamuffins. There are Christians who stand up for justice, who fight against evil, and who tirelessly love their neighbors.

These are the representatives of Jesus. These are those who are His hands and feet and voice in this age of uncertainty and chaos.

These are who we are all called to be.

We can base our view of the church on the former or on the latter - but as for me, I am choosing to focus on the latter.

I mentioned before I recently read Liz Cooledge Jenkins' "Nice Church Patriarchy". One of the most striking things about her book was while she did get angry at systems of oppression, she had this way of forgiving those who perpetrated it. She didn't blame them for it. She noted how they had inherited these systems, it was all they had ever known, and they had no reason to question it until someone (like her) pointed it out to them.

It is easy to get angry or bitter or resentful towards the church in her failings. It is harder to find compassion, patience, and love, yet that is exactly what Jesus calls us to do. "Love your enemies," He said. "Pray for those who persecute you." The only thing was, we thought He meant people outside of the church, not those in it.

Anger and bitterness and resentment won't change anything. At least, they won't change anything for the better. They may poison our hearts, destroy our relationships, and tear down bridges. 

No. If we want to see change for the better, we have to let go. Let go of the negative feelings. Forgive the hurt.

And speak the truth in love.

Change starts with one changed heart. One and then one more. Ripples of influence. 

Gandhi once said, "Be the change you wish to see in the world." If we want to see a more compassionate, healing Christian community, we need to be a more compassionate, healing individual. If we want to see a church committed to the Bible and living the way of Jesus, we need to be committed to the Bible and living the way of Jesus. And so on and so on, amen.

Let me share with you a verse that God's been using to speak to me lately. This is Jesus' words to Peter just before His arrest, when He predicts Peter's denial of Him:

"Satan has asked to sift all of you as wheat. But I have prayed for you, Simon, that your faith may not fail. And when you have turned back, strengthen your brothers.” - Luke 22:31-32

Several things stand out here to me. One, clearly, Jesus implies here He gave Satan permission to sift the disciples like wheat. But, He tells Simon Peter, He also prayed Peter's faith will not fail. But what really blows my mind is the next part - "when you have turned back". In other words, Jesus' knew that despite His prayers, Peter would fall. He would stumble. He would fail. BUT, afterwards, he would also turn back.

So many things I could say about this verse! I will stick with this main point, however, which is what Jesus told Peter to do after he came back to faith: strengthen your brothers (more inclusive language here would say, 'brothers and sisters' or 'fellow believers').

I have heard this verse a few different times over the past few months, and every time I hear God applying this verse to me. I have been sifted as wheat. I fell. I stumbled. I failed. BUT... I have also turned back.

And now, God is calling me to strengthen the believers.

That is why the title of my blog still stands. I may no longer be jaded. I may be healing from the hurt and anger and disillusionment surrounding everything I went through over the past six years. BUT I have found a new, strengthened faith in Jesus and I am moving forward by His grace. And in doing so, I long to help others who are jaded. Who are questioning and challenging the direction of the church. Who have been hurt by those who claim Jesus' name.

I see the pain you carry. I have been there. I am making it through.

And I want to see you through, too.

Once I went to this place in the mountains of Peru called Cumbemayo. It's a funky looking mountain with weird rock formations. There's a path you can walk through at a certain part which is only about a foot or two wide, and pitch black. There's a point in the middle where you can't see the beginning or the end or even your feet beneath you. There are guides - most of them kids, only eight nine years old - who have been on the path before, and if you want, they lead you through. They take you by the hand and you trust them to guide your steps, not knowing what you are stepping on or where you are going, because they have been there many times before.

The beauty that arises from ashes is those who have been through a trauma are often the best guides to help others through their traumas. Recovering addicts make the best substance abuse coaches. Reformed felons make the best case managers for those recently released from prison. Bereaved family members make the best grief counselors. 

But... only if they have found healing. Only if they have found forgiveness. Only if they have found compassion.

In psychology, we call this "post-traumatic growth" or "post-traumatic wisdom". 

My prayer today, both for myself and for any others who have fallen along the way, is that we will get back up, turn back, and head straight towards Jesus. My prayer is we will cast our anger and hurt and bitterness on Him, and receive His peace and compassion and love, that then we may strengthen the believers.

May we be the change we wish to see.

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Comments

Shaun C. Kennedy
10 months ago

And don't forget, some of me aren't too bright and would never find you again if your changed the name of you blog. That would be a mean thing to do to me.

Timothy Nichols
10 months ago

I have been blessed with the gift of interpretation. I know things that are written in the Bible that no other has ever seen. The parables Jesus spoke are most profound.
offend them, go to the sea, cast in a hook, and take the fish that comes up first. And when you have opened its mouth, you will find a piece of money; take that and give it to them for Me and you.”

With so many ministries in the world backed by countless preachers proclaiming they know the ways of God how does one go about finding the right one to follow.
Finding the truth is the main objective when trying to follow the gospel that Jesus preached.
In 1 John 4:1 the Apostle wrote how to tell if a person was speaking the truth of the gospel saying ;
“ Beloved, do not believe every spirit, but test the spirits, whether they are of God; because many false prophets have gone out into the world.
John stated way back then that there were many false prophets in the world. If there were many back then how many does it stand to reason are in the world today preaching.
Network television and satellites have made it easier to reach worldwide attention. Stages set up with the back drop of Israel are designed to place confidence in the minds of the viewer.

So with all this going on how does a person go about testing the spirit to see if it is from God or from a man? There are several ways this can be done. Does the agenda fit the purpose ? In other words for the purpose of saving others is that preacher placing his own personal livelihood on the line for the sake of saving a soul ?
Jesus taught that there was no greater love than for a man to lay down his life for his friend. He also taught that it was better to be poor than to be rich and to the man who asked what he must do to follow Him Jesus replied, “ sell all that you have and follow Me.”
And moreover, because the Preacher was wise, he still taught the people knowledge; yes, he pondered and sought out and set in order many proverbs.

The best way to test the men preaching is to first find out if he uses other scriptures to explain the verses at hand.
Most Bible verses present enigmas which leave it up to the listener to understand. A proverb falls under this same category leaving questions to be answered. Once the questions are answered then the truth surfaces.
When Bible verses are lined up properly they will collectively explain the proverb. If this in return does not fit with what the preacher has said concerning the scripture in question then it can be assumed that the preacher in question is just that.
Many verses on the surface may not appear to be any deeper than the topic which is being discussed, while in reality they can be deeper than the deepest seas. Take for instance the topic of taxes that Jesus spoke in Matthew 17:27.
On the surface it appears that Jesus was simply instructing His disciples in Matthew 17:27 how to pay the tax collectors. If you follow things He had mentioned directly previously however the waters become clearer. Looked at closely and meditated upon and you can see that there’s something more laying beneath the surface.
 Nevertheless, lest we offend them, go to the sea, cast in a hook, and take the fish that comes up first. And when you have opened its mouth, you will find a piece of money; take that and give it to them for Me and you. Matthew 17:27

While many may say God can do anything so why would it be so far fetched that He would place a coin in the mouth of a fish.
Why wouldn’t He tell that fish to hold the coin until a hook comes down. He could then instruct the sea creature that when a hook appears to bite it and be sure to not let the coin fall out as he is being pulled to the surface.
While it is certain that God could very easily accomplish the aforementioned task it is not highly likely. For God has given each person a thing called common sense and He would not do anything that would go against this very important emotion. After all, common sense is crucial to the survival of each and every person ever born.
But…If left up to the common preacher what other explanation could be offered? By doing what was just done here the spirit of the preacher in question has been tested…whether he is teaching from the true Spirit of God or under a guise in order to suit his own personal agenda.
The astute preacher who has the Spirit guiding him will have followed the Spirit as his intuition led him to another verse. In that verse another clue is found.
“Again, the kingdom of heaven is like a merchant seeking fine pearls…

Jesus used pearls in the verse to represent truths that are found beneath the words of the verses being read. Notice should be taken to how pearls were set apart by the word “fine.”
In keeping with the topic at hand the preacher continues his search for where pearl is mentioned elsewhere in the Bible.
At this point from a personal perspective, a concordance was not n

Timothy Nichols
10 months ago

sonal perspective, a concordance was not needed to locate the various verses used within. It was all based off of intuition and guidance from the Spirit.
And as I felt the Spirit move clues continued to make connections as other verses came into sight.…
…and upon finding one pearl of great value, he went and sold all that he had and bought it
Once the student finds one truth it is certain they will start looking for other truths that are laying beneath the surface. Nothing else in the world can compare to what he had experienced in finding out words which were not written but which were there nonetheless…
So up to this point the preacher has learned that pearls represent truths which are special gifts from God.
The truth concerning the original topic of discussion here is now staring into the faces of those that have put forth the effort to learn how the Spirit moves….in testing the spirit of the preacher the question the student should have asked after his vain explanation as to how a fish could be found to have a coin in its mouth is this…. What type of money did the first sea creature which was brought up have in its mouth?
In dealing with false prophets and non believers Jesus warned,
Do not give what is holy to the dogs; nor cast your pearls before swine, lest they trample them under their feet, and turn and tear you in pieces.
To relay the truth to a person who has the power of Satan behind him will result in a horrible backlashing every time. Many past prophets were persecuted and put to death even for going against the culture and speaking the truth.

The woman was arrayed in purple and scarlet, and adorned with gold and precious stones and pearls, having in her hand a golden cup full of abominations and the filthiness of her fornication.
Revelation is the hardest book of the Bible to understand. It is impossible to understand what is being said without the knowledge that is contained throughout the pages of the Bible.

There was nothing written in the Bible that had not already been written. In laymen’s terms this means that for every verse or passage that Jesus and the Apostles had spoken the answer or truth to that passage can be found elsewhere in the Bible. Sometimes it will take several different verses or passages to fully bring to the surface the truth of what was being written.
Knowing the only way to understand Revelation is through other scriptures, we must also keep in mind that Satan is the father of lies. In order to execute a lie to its fullest potential the truth must be known. After all, if the truth isn’t known then how can he pin point where to place the lie so that it is most effective?

The woman was arrayed in purple and scarlet, and adorned with gold and precious stones and pearls, having in her hand a golden cup full of abominations and the filthiness of her fornication.
Here the verse from Revelation depicts the church that has been under the influences of Satan. Notice how she is adorned with pearls and with fine apparel. Monetary things that comes from the tithes and offerings.
The church has in its possession the entirety of the scriptures. Lying in those pages are countless truths concerning the Kingdom of God which Jesus described as the Pearl of great price. But Satan is doing everything in his power to keep those truths hidden…to the point that he is adorning himself with the pearls that lie beneath the pages. After all, he is trying to exalt himself above God…
He is covering the truth with lies. He knows that the truth must be searched for and that most people simply read over the verses. So he is in possession of the truth knowing it is staring people in the face but keeping them from possessing them through fairy tales and lies.
When listening to the big time evangelists many think, he must know what he’s talking about…
But…if you are ever in question and want to find out if who you had been listening to is official, then present to them this simple question….what kind of money was in the mouth of the fish in Matthew 17:27.
Offering a clue might help…it was a piece of money that would be accepted by any nation or tribe of the day without question or doubt….in fact they are still valued today as the most prized possession that can be found in the depths of the sea…
You see, the thing about uncovering the truths that are hidden throughout the pages of the Bible is how you can’t stop searching for them. As Jesus once taught…
“ Therefore every scribe instructed concerning the kingdom of heaven is like a householder who brings out of his treasure things new and old.”
It just keeps coming. Once it does the connections are endless both to what has been read in times past and what is now being read and in things which will be read …and the pearls keep piling up..Amen

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